Snoopy

 

 

“You need a dog, mom.”

 

“No, I don’t think so.  I don’t want a dog right now.”

 

And so it goes… it’s gone.  This conversation — again and again.  They think I need company.  I think I don’t need any more unfamiliar.  They think a dogger would fill the lonely.  I think nothing will ever fill the lonely.  They think my mind is closed.  I think my whole self is closed.  Down.  At least for now.

“Shut your eyes, Mom.  Open your heart.  Hold out your hands.  Ok.  You can open them now.”

 

And there he was.  My puppy.  My company.  My lonely-filler.  The opener to my heart. 
His name is Snoopy, or Snoopers, or Snoops. 

 

This is day 3.  I don’t really know how to raise a puppy.  Our family did it yeeeeears ago.  But that was a different me.  That was a Kath whose heart was fully in tact.  I raised herbs, kids, kids’ friends, puppies; I raised a husband.  Do I know how to raise anything now?

 

What I know is that in 3 days, we, Snoops and I, are completely attached.  He follows me everywhere.  I snuggle him until play time.  Does he know my voice?  His name?  Already?  Am I one of those loony dog-owners?  Already?

 

Ok then.  Tell me what I need.  Then do what I need.  You know best.  Better than me.  I don’t want to be closed.  What I want are friends and family that speak life and joy to me.  I think I remember that favorite stuff gets chewed, soiled, thrown out.  I remember that dogger life is work!  But what I want is this dogger — Snoopy.  I can’t wait for Snooper days ahead.